


My Fiancé's Lover

by muchakacalambra



Category: Mass Effect, My Husband's Lover (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Homophobia, M/M, Smut, Soap Opera
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-27
Updated: 2014-08-27
Packaged: 2018-02-14 12:31:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2191944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muchakacalambra/pseuds/muchakacalambra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She never expected any of this...</p><p>	It began when time became cruel...it's been a year and half..and they haven't even wed yet.</p><p>	Second, there was the showering  of gifts and the constant attention John was giving her...<br/>and yet...despite all the sweetness...it felt like poisoned honey.</p><p>	...and third, John was having an affair...but not with another woman.</p><p>        *Roughly added Chapter 1 :)</p><p>	*A retelling of the Hit Filipino Soap Opera "My Husband's Lover" in the Mass Effect universe.  Thank you jupiter_james for inspiring me the idea! :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So.....yeah...this is my first fanfic...I really hope it could live up to expectations :). I'm purely Filipino...so please forgive my grammar.... :)
> 
> In Ph, our televesion broadcasts are exclusive to Soap Operas..and with "My Husband's Lover" leading the primetime block last 2013, it was awesome to watch a gay themed series...well...not just me, but my entire family...the series inspired me to watch other gay storylines out there...which eventually led me to discover Mass Effect...that's why I've been scavenging around mShenko fanfics in AO3...comming cross jupiter_james's "Burn Down the Sky" made me realize I could write both of favorite supercouples into one story...so...there you have it... :)
> 
>  
> 
> MHL's Theme Song "One More Try" ---> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmvnQ6ZWAIE

 

  _Should we_ ** _stay_** _or should we say goodbye?_  
 _Walk away or give it one more try?_  
 _What a waste to let our_ ** _dreams_** _just fly_  
 _And as the days go by_  
 _We'll always wonder_ ** _why_**.

 

 

They say the sea holds so many wonders.. 

...and the light of the sun has always been  _so_  supportive.

Scales of fish glitter...luminous colors  _entwining_  with that of the corals.

It's a mark of beauty anyone would have seen when they dive near the shore...

Swimming farther, the azure becomes a darker shade of mystery...a curiosity to quench...and yet...why do I turn back?

To be  _blinded_  by the charm of the reefs? Or  _maybe_... _just_ maybe...because I am afraid... _afraid_  of what I might find at the bottom of the abyss.

 

That's how I looked at  _Jonathan Christopher Shepard_.  

 

 

 _Are we glad to find one day we're_ _**free**?_  
 _Is this what we really want to be?_  
 _Brand new lives, we need to have so much_  
 _It really is quite tough_  
 _When love is_ ** _not_** _enough_.  

 

 

His cerulean blue eyes were ever twinkling with uncertainty, dark brown hair coiffured, and sweat glistening on his forehead.

Though at arm's length...I  _still_  felt like it was close to my personal space... _so_  close that I could feel the warmth of his breath...a very  _tense_  breath.

I took a step back to the  _inevitable_  as he slowly got down on one knee, his  _intense_  stare never shifting away.

The gaze was so  _mesmerizing_...like...like a...like a  _darker_  shade of the sea...making me shift  _unnervingly_.

Both of his hands laid at the side of his pants as he tried to rub the sweat off his palms...

It was followed by a  _gesture_  that made my heart heavier...

What he took out  _however_ , made it beat faster...

A  _small black box_.

 

 

 _Tell me why did we find each other?_    
 _Only to part ways in the end_    
 _Tell me how we_ ** _learned_** _to love each other?_    
 _And tell me why two people have to_ ** _change_** _?_

 

There was a large inhale.

"I...I...know  _life_  can offer so many challenges..." his voice was low and deep.

"...b...b...but...when I met you..." there was  _not_  a moment where his stuttering wasn't obvious.

"I knew I could meet them if you're willing to face them to...to... _together_." The last line was hoarse.

"You deserve the best...someone who...who..will be there without limits...someone who will protect you without hesitation..."

He narrowed his eyes and he looked... _gloomy_. Why was this making him so  _downtrodden_?

"...someone who will always say...I...lo... _love..._ you." he croaked...as if he was oddly regretting it.

"So...will you le...le...let me  _take_  your hand..." he raised the small black box.

"a...a..and be the one...to k...kiss you after you say 'I d...do' ".

His eyes made its way down the pavement...in  _guilt._

 

 

 _Was it pride that made us drift away?_    
 _Hurting words we should not even say_    
 _Hold my hand and look straight in my_ ** _eyes_**    
 _If we can't say goodbye_

 

 

The expression he made looked like he was unsure...like how  _I_  was unsure.

 _All_  my life I was looked down upon. I was the bookworm hanging over the edge of the classroom.

How could someone  _so_  kind, caring, gentle and handsome as  _Shepard_...want me as his bride to be?

His mother speaks ill of me...and my mother....left me and my sisters because we took love for granted.

A tragic mirroring of how father... _abandoned_  us for another woman.

I love him. I  _love_  him so much..and I will do everything in my power to become the  _perfect_  wife. 

The aura was trembling...

I took a deep breath nevertheless...

...but my answer was  _barely_  more than whisper...

 

 _"Yes_."

 

 

 

 _Then we're worth..._ **_one more try_ ** _..._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My name is  _Liara TSoni_...and this is the story of...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

my fiancé's offer...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

my fiancé's cover... 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I obviously love dramatic introductions... :)
> 
> I pray for the next chapters to be up as soon as possible..but I will make no such promises...I'm still a college student...a very busy college student at that.


	2. The Road to Nothingness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One word, DRAMA.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I separated and re-edited this chapter from the prologue instead.

 

 

Sometimes we let our burdens,

things we thought _impossible_ to overcome,

 heighten the weight of our footsteps. Changing _directions_ to an immeasurable void,

unable to break free. But I take _Sabriel_ 's quote as an awakening:

" _Does the walker choose the path, or the path choose the walker?"_

I am  _Liara T'Soni_. Encumbered. Enamored. Engaged.

 

 

It was a night to  _forget_...well, in  _Shepard's_  place, and the heavens were downright  _mocking_  him.  Her luna-cy,  a cosmic chandelier,  was mischievously grinning down the rich mosaic binding the gardens of Villa Pastor. She floated above a particularly busted tile, who was scowling at her incandescent streams.  With his feet bouncing up and down the soil, Shepard fervently waited for the crescent glow to cascade far beyond the black horizon, keenly wishing it to fade like the vexatious Cheshire cat. He doubted the celestials for putting him in this bothersome scene, but the moon continued to glow. Her children, a backdrop of sparkling diamonds, were inconveniently joining in the fun.

Shepard sucked in a mouthful of air, a hand sheltering his door, as he turned his gaze to the lavish, opulent meal on his table. Although the hickory smoked baby back ribs was smothered in stout glaze,   he had scantily touched his meal, even pushing the plate along with the starchy mashed potatoes, and the thick unadorned fries.  The mass clattering of knives and forks hastily caught his attention. The guests were all too engrossed on consuming the savory banquet. He was hungry alright, but the  _pressure_  tumbling on his mind made him utterly dissatisfied for not having the appetite of a ravenous dog.

He lifted the arm on his left to read the metal strap attached to his wrist, a widget of arms telling him it had hardly passed a minute. He groaned "Just three more  _hours_. Just three more  _agonizing_ hours, and then it's over." Shepard said, mumbling. Rapidly, but unconsciously, Shepard began to bite his  lips...twiddle his thumbs...play with his hair...tug his cloth-

 _Ting, ting, ting._ Donovan Shepard, general, father, and homophobic extraordinaire startled his only son as he rose from his seat, a glass in hand, his noble presence signaling the audience to the same.

"I may have married late..." The old man scratched his silver stubble "...but I sure made a hell of a bachelor." His deep wrinkles couldn't hide the smirk, nor his wink, framed by thick grey eyebrows. The effort made the echo of laughter  _burst_  around the grand reception like wildfire. Shepard seemed to voice the tiniest, a  _fake_  laugh, in the thriving mass of anonymous figures.

"That may have been the reason why Hannah and I only had one child." he chuckled. "I am just so  _proud._ Proud that my son has become a  _man_." Shepard gulped.

"Proud  that he is ready to  _wed_..." Shepard wheezed, and Liara turned her head with an eyebrow raised.

"...and perhaps... _anxiously_  proud..." His eyes turned to Shepard "...to see my future grandchildren  _early_." That was  _it_. Shepard coughed hard. He tried to clear his throat and swiftly regain composure, but a hundred pairs of white blobs were already  _tearing_  into his skin like fingernails. It made his back itch, and it was impossible to reach.

"John?" Liara tried to ask, concerned, patting his back. "I'm fine...it's just the wine." he jerked his head away.

Liara furrowed her brows. "But we haven't started drinking..."

"Uhh..." he looked at the ceiling. "...I m...may have swallowed a fly..." there was a raise of shoulders.

"A fly?" she quirked her head in a particular way.

"Huff. Guess I'm just nervous...I'm just not ready to become...a father." He shrugged nonchalantly, trying to mask the apprehension.

Liara smiled. It worked. "I am too..." He returned the smile... _lightly._

"To Jonathan Christopher H. Shepard!" Donovan held a glass of wine in one hand, slowly setting it above his head. The crowd followed soon thereafter "To  _John_!"

Shepard slightly tucked his chin, and stared at the effervescent alcohol in his hand. The bursting bubbles mimicked his instability, oh how he wished  to come out, but Donovan Shepard was proud. He had to maintain the  _acceptance_. The  _honor_. So, he swallowed it  _all_  down...like the rest of his identity, hiding in the  _closet_.

* * *

Howls of chatter were starting to make Shepard uneasy.

"The man is downright beautiful. I mean com'on, have you ever seen such a  _strong_  face." echoed to his right.

"...and those deep blue  _eyes_.." echoed to his left.

"What a  _tight_  vest..." His head sank...

"Liara sure hit the lottery." ...lower.

"I  _heard_  he took down Grunt."  _ENOUGH_. If  _only_. If only they  _knew_   who they were dealing with. Who he  _really_  was. Would the praises still  _endure_? Would the respect still  _linger_? The battle churning in his guts just won't stop. He stood abruptly from his chair ignoring the bewildered faces of Liara and company.

"I...I need some air..." he parted, losing his tone.

"Sure." came her quick reply. "He's a bit nervous..." she acknowledged the crowd. "...about all  _this_." she said lifting her arms.

Shepard grunted as he hurriedly escaped the guests, he  _hated_  all this. It was a fool's errand. The  _hypocrisy_. The  _deceit_. He was sighing as he gripped for the edge of the buffet table. An aroma of grilled steak sandwiches might of calmed Shepard, but he knew he was still  _bothered_  and  _ashamed_.   _All_  his life he was looked up upon. He was the breadwinner hanging over the edge of his father. How could someone  _so_  kind, caring, gentle and stunning as  _Liara_...want him as his husband to be? A  _gay_  man. There was  _no_  love for Liara, and he realized it from the very  _beginning_. The only love he truly desired  _departed_.

"Where is he?" he muttered.

"He  _promised_. Where...is  _K_ -"

"Shepard." A hand firmly gripped the back of his shoulder, taking him out of his trance. Quickly, his head turned to rough golden hair and glinting grey eyes.

"You look dissappointed, didn't ya miss me?" he called out.

"Vakarian!" he barked a laugh.

"There's no need for formalities! Come 'ere!" Garrus pulled Shepard into a tight hug.  _Two years_. That was the last time he saw his best friend leave for the Citadel, positioning as chief of police. Garrus Vakarian may be stern with his gun, but he is quite ludicrous with his antics.  His arms packed a punch back in the day, now, with a physique much more muscular, he could already feel the strength of his embrace. Was it wrong to think that he was  _enveloping_  the heat to someone else? To  _touch_  the dark curly hair? To  _smell_  the...

"..aa..Shepard...you can release me now." he uttered a breath. Shepard didn't notice he was cuddling Garrus's neck for at least a minute. He hastily tried to pull away, face pinked.

"Uhh...sorry about that...guess I did miss you that much..." Shepard said, eyes darting towards the side.

Garrus cackled. "Well it's been way to long time since I remembered your ugly face." Shepard snorted.

"Fuck off, Garrus. Your still the same wacky old dude who-"

" _Zip_  it. I know what you're going to say and we promised to never speak of it  _again_. But really, you look like you need a break. Is the party making your bones wiggle?"

John lowered his gaze "That's an understatement." Garrus raised a brow. "Yeah, yeah...sigh...I'm a total wreck." He leaned his back on the wall, hands on pockets. "The engagement is bugging me." Garrus crossed his arms over his chest.

"Shepard, tell me, what's really going on?" Garrus leaned beside him. Shepard knew he couldn't lie to his best friend, no matter how he trusted him or how he tried dodging the bullet. It was a risk losing...another close companion. Garrus was still observant. There was no twitch, inhale, or pulse he wouldn't sense, and that made him a great police chief. University was a time when Garrus suspected  that the geometry professor was the  _one_  who stole Dean Kahlee Sander's collection of...poles. He was right of course, but the way he found it out still sent  _chills_  to Shepard's spine. They promised to never speak of it  _again_.

"Garrus, there are some things better off-" Shepard stopped, eyes widening at the man waiting for him at the gates.

"Excuse me...I should go..." he was already five meters away when he pardoned himself. He didn't hear Garrus's response as he started walking briskly. The bald man's suit  _may_  have made the tie and peaked lapels around his chocolate brown skin dapper, but Shepard was  _clearly_  not impressed. Steve Cortez anticipated the tautness and the two automatically headed to the corner of the street.

"Steve, what the hell are you doing here?" Shepard waved his arms around, panicked.  "Get out before everyone sees you!" The pain carved onto Steve's features made Shepard feel like a jerk, but  _he_  was jerk. A dirty lying  _jerk_ , but the thought of Steve pronouncing his...identity...just made him shiver, and he wouldn't allow that to happen, not when everything was finally turning out right. Right?

"Shepard!" He pleaded, eyes reddening. "Liara doesn't deserve to be with someone who is not committed!" he grasped Shepard's vest, bundling the cloth so tightly in his fists that Shepard had to gasp.

" _I_  can be committed." he rigidly wrapped his hands around Steve's elbows. "I can  _love_  her just like how every straight guy can. I can show you that your... _kind_...this  _thing_...is just an illusion, an  _abnormality_." He was stammering, despite hardening his words.

"This  _isn't_  a disease Shepard!" Steve shook him firmly, and Shepard has to wince as he begged "Sooner or later, this fantasy of yours won't last!" Steve pierces his eyes right through him. "You can't hide forever!"

Shepard heightened his voice saying "I have family...an  _obliga_ -!" 

"You are 25  _goddamn_  years old! Steve shook him again "You're too young to marry! You can be a free man, a free  _gay_  m-!

" _WHY CAN'T YOU JUST UNDERSTAND_?!" Shepard cut him off harshly, shouting, making the hair on Steve's skin hike.  "My mother might get disappointed, but my father,  _HE'LL NEVER_  welcome who  _I am_ , he...he'll...probably disown me,  throw me out just like-"

"...what my family  _did_  to me?!". For a moment, Shepard was speechless. He had almost forgotten that Steve had faced more dire situations that he could ever struggle. "Of course  _I UNDERSTAND!_ " he yelled.

"I understand the  _pain_. I understand the  _fear_. I understand the  _consequences_." Steve's voice was cracking by the minute. "I understand the  _turmoil_ bumbling in your head!" he lost it. "It will  _all_  turn out better  _if_  you start admitting the truth right now!" Shepard lowered his head, contemplating. 

"My family called me last week and they regretted everything." Steve tried to persuade, to no avail. He unthinkingly started caressing his supple cheek, lifting his chin.

"My family is different...we  _have_  a standing..." Shepard reasoned, voice wavering. "I...I..I'll be the laughingstock of the town...the  _General's_...g..gay son..."

"...and yet, you were willing to risk everything for  _him_." The allusive comment made Shepard cringe. Steve intently stared at him, and It all happened too quickly. He lunged for Shepard's mouth, brushing the top of his lips. Steve's fingers were winding up his hair. All the muscles on Shepard's face went slack, and his lips, turned spongy and loose. He tried to return the kiss by closing his eyes, imagining the man he used to embrace. It  _hurt_. Shepard pushed Steve away, his brunt strength knocking him to the ground.

"It's still him  _isn't_  it?" Shepard couldn't bare face him, so he pivoted on his good foot, still acting poised, his breath shallow.

Steve started laughing as he tried to get off the road, but tears were already pouring against his cheeks. "After all this time?" he asked, hoarse, rubbing the dirt from his shoulders. What he didn't expect was a glimmer of something so small,  dropping near the base of Shepard's shoes.

"It pains me to know th...that I may have been just a...a  _ragged_  doll.  _Stuffed_  for comfort." he was slowly breaking. "I hope you get out of this... _whatever_  this is...'coz I'll try to find my own happiness...with someone else..." Shepard placed a palm on his forehead.

"If he ever returns, I wish him good luck. Please, don't try to break his heart."  A silence. A long silence.

Shepard slowly turned around to find the road to nothingness.  

"What's all the racket about?!" called Donovan. He was stomping towards Shepard, a grimace planted on his face. "We heard shouting!" Liara was following him behind.

"Nothing." he drew back, swiping the tears from his cheeks. "Some...madman drove like he was the king of the road. Splashed some water on my face."

"...and you had the courage to berate him? Did you kick his ass?" his father asked gleefully. Like the knowledge of fighting on the road was something to pride on.

"Yeah..." Liara sensed the trouble, but she let it go, for now.

"You must have scared him off! Heh! Nobody messes with a general's son!" Donovan roared in laughter. The sound booming all around, the dry leaves blowing in the wind, singing in the same chorus.

But everything still felt empty,  _so_  empty.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will REALLy focus on the mShenko flashback. :)


End file.
